I encountered my very first cockroach, and this wasn’t any ordinary roach…this fellow was a freakin’ M1A1 battle tank.
In an emergency all-night parliamentary meeting, the government of the Republic of Bryan voted unanimously to ignore the UN Rules Governing the Conduct of War and Armed Conflict and pursue a policy of genocide. It was decided that such a policy was the only option which would protect the freedom, liberty and integrity of our great nation. Only creatures of the two legged variety will be permitted to reside, work and pursue leisure activities within the borders of the Republic.
Parliament also approved the allocation of funds towards the purchase and acquisition of advanced biochemical weapon platforms which will assist the conventional forces in operations against this formidable foe.
Triangle spokesperson Major Johnson said that mobilization orders we given several hours ago, and the combat phase of Operation Righteous Cleansing is expected to commence as early as tomorrow afternoon. It is rumoured that the crack, and highly secretive First Special Weapons Division will play a pivotal role, with conventional forces operating in a support capacity. Strategic Air Command has been ordered on hot alert and will be carrying high yield RAID weaponry. Tactical ordanence packages will be deployed throughout the country in order to faciliate quick and rapid responses.
Critics argue that the government is going too far in authorizing the use of chemical and biological weaponry, claiming instead that such systems pose an unnecessary risk to citizen health. “I can’t believe those assholes up on the Hill are so narrow-minded that they are actually considering the use of such barbaric forms of mass murder” said one protester, dressed in Che Guevara T-shirt. “This is a blatant war of aggression by the imperialistic, corporate lackeys running the government. This isn’t democracy. I didn’t vote for this fucking war. But you know, it’s only about the oil and other resources…the government doesn’t like it that these guys were here first”.
Prime Minister Crosby responded by stating that “This is neither the time nor place for timidness. The creatures don’t respect our way of life, there is no reason we should respect theirs. These disgusting creatures pose a threat to our way of life, and must be exterminated at all costs. This is a worldwide problem, and we have the full support of our neighbors, some of whom have even offerred military assistance. We all must rise to the task at hand. We must hit hard, and hit fast. Morale is high. Surrender is not an option. We will be victorious”.
Seriously though…I hate these things, and I am going to kill them all.